Regardless of how many times you’ve had sex, you’ve probably had a moment or two where you thought to yourself, “Wait, am I even doing this right?” or “Does he actually like this?” For women, it’s easy to get caught up in worries about what men think of you, especially the techniques you use to please him.
It’s a bit of an uncomfortable situation when you have these thoughts, but you’ve been there nonetheless. Even if you’ve been dating for months, there’s still a good chance you don’t know quite everything about what he likes. Sure, you’ve rolled around with this guy plenty of times before, but is there something you’re doing that he’s too afraid to tell you?
Chances are you may not be the sex goddess you believe yourself to be at times, we are sorry to say. Yes, there are quite a few sex mistakes women make that make men go nuts… and not in a good way. But not to worry because we are here to let you in on a few unspoken wishes from real guys who have had some less than enjoyable sexual encounters.
To clear things up on those awkward, cringe-worthy bedroom moments, we went straight to the source. We asked these 13 men to dish on what we’ve been getting wrong all this time between the sheets, from what we’re doing to what we’re not doing.
As for the sex mistakes women make and are getting horribly wrong between the sheets? Well, it ranges from using your teeth during blowjobs to subtly faking orgasms.
The good news is, he thinks you’re sexy and he wants you to be happy in bed, but you’re going to have to speak up and help him out. As Ricky, 25, put it: “We both have the same goal — to get to the promised land. But I can’t get you there without a bit of a road map. You’re an expert on your own body, so if I need to do something to make this night a good one, please let me know!”
Hey, we’re all works in progress – even in the bedroom. Read on to see what these men had to say about everything from harsh handjobs to impromptu “butt play.”
1. Being too quiet
“There’s nothing more awkward than having sex with a girl when the only noise you hear is the squeak of the bed. If what I’m doing to you feels good, make some noise!”
2. Not touching his testicles
“Don’t neglect them. Fondle them, massage them, give them a good pull when deep-throating. We like it, so don’t be shy.”
3. Giving harsh handjobs
“I have no idea why some women think we want our junk pulled off during a handjob. There’s got to be a rhythm to it. Also, please don’t be shy to spit into your hand occasionally while you’re doing it.”
4. Assuming we like the same things
“I hooked up with a girl who loved having her nipples played with. Eventually, we got to sex, and when I told her I was about to finish, she reached up and started ferociously pinching and twisting my nipples. I haven’t spoken to her since, and I’d be lying if I said this had nothing to do with it.”
5. Not making the first move
“I’m 33 and still don’t ever really know how soon is too soon to initiate sex with a girl since everyone is different. But I do know that having her let me know she’s ready by taking her clothes off is the sexiest thing ever.”
6. Not speaking up about what you want
“Women know what they like and don’t like, but a lot of them don’t really verbalize it. We both have the same goal: to get to the promised land. But I can’t get you there without a bit of a road map. You’re an expert on your own body, so if I need to do something to make this night a good one, please let me know!”
7. Trying impromptu butt play
“Butt play without discussion might get you accidentally mule kicked.”
8. Using your teeth
“Sure this has been said before, but seriously, be aware of whether or not your teeth are involved when you’re giving head. It hurts like a bitch.”
9. Faking an orgasm
“Men do not want a woman to fake an orgasm. We can take the honest criticism. It will only help us get better.”
10. Not participating
“Sex is a two person event, and both people should be willing and excited to participate. There’s no fun in doing all the work while the other person just lays there. Switch positions and get in on the fun — it’s a team sport!”
11. Giving too much, too soon
“Recently this girl gave me a blowjob and it was great… except it started with all these fast wrist motions, and lots of lip and tongue action right away. When you’re giving head, ease into it. This isn’t a contest. Get comfortable and let it build.”
12. Being too self-conscious
“You’d be surprised at how many women won’t accept things like oral because of their own body issues. If I want to do something special for you, let me. Don’t keep thinking, ‘OMG does he think I’m attractive?!’ Because of course I do!”
13. Giving hickeys
“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but ladies, please don’t try to intentionally mark us. The last girl I dated did this all the time when we were having sex and I don’t understand why she thought it was hot. If anything it makes you look insecure. Do you really need to leave your mark to make sure everyone knows I’m off the market? No thanks.”