Usually, relationships start off really well in the sexual department. There’s just something inherently thrilling about being able to discover and explore another person’s body. And it’s that thrill and excitement during the early parts of a relationship that can really carry a couple. This is what a lot of people like to refer to as the “honeymoon period” in a relationship. However, over time, a lot of people will find that the sexual intensity in a relationship tends to die down. As the relationship draws on and on, people will discover more differences between them. And these differences will range over a variety of issues – and sometimes, that includes sex. For instance, people may disagree on the kind of sex that they like, the frequency of their sexual adventures, and a bunch of other things.
However, the most common conflict arises from the difference in the levels of one’s desire for sex. And gender doesn’t even have anything to do with it. It’s more likely that one person is going to want sex more than the other. When that’s the case, there is a lot of room for arguments and disagreements. One person is going to feel more harassed and rejected. It’s no secret that in a lot of marriages, having different levels of sexual desire can cause some serious frustration and hostility between two people.
If this is a problem that is present in your relationship, what can you do to curb it? How exactly do you approach this problem so as to ensure that it doesn’t completely destroy your relationship as a whole? Well, read on further to get a better idea.
1. Think about it from a new perspective.
Hypothetically, when your sexual advances are constantly being turned down by your partner, then it’s likely that you are the one who wants to be having more sex in the relationship. And you are already so frustrated at the idea of your partner just being unwilling to engage with you in a sexual capacity. You thought that being in an intimate and committed relationship with someone would mean that you would never have to beg for sex. And yet, here you are. You are desperate for constant action and your partner just doesn’t seem to want to take part in any of it.
First of all, you have to adjust your perspective a little bit. You have to consider the possibility that you’re just being unreasonable about it all. Remember that there is no universal standard for the amount of sex that the two of you should be having in your relationship. There are no rules when it comes to this matter. So it might not be that your partner isn’t giving you enough sex. It might just be that you are demanding too much of it. You have to see things from your partner’s perspective as well. You have to know that respect is essential in any kind of relationship. And you really need to respect your partner’s right to set boundaries in the relationship. Sometimes, a simple change in perspective would be enough for you to fix the issues that you have in your relationship.
2. Try talking things out first.
If you feel like you just can’t suppress your feelings in the matter, it’s important that you let it all out. In any kind of intimate relationship, you should always feel safe about expressing yourself to your partner. And since this is an issue that really matters to you, it’s important that you don’t keep your feelings bottled up inside. Even if it’s a really awkward conversation for you to have, it’s still essential that you are able to talk about it. First, make sure that you and your partner are in a neutral and comfortable setting for you to have this conversation. Next, before you actually open up, you need to manage your expectations. Just because you open up about how you feel doesn’t necessarily guarantee that you are going to be able to change your partner’s mind.
There are very few problems in a relationship that can’t be fixed with honest and effective communication. There is a slight chance that when your partner hears your take on the matter, they are going to adjust so as to meet your needs somewhat. Never be so willing to underestimate the value of communication in the relationship.
At the end of the day, sex isn’t going to be an insignificant aspect of a modern relationship. Sex is the pinnacle of physical intimacy between two people. And if you really want to get closer to your partner, you always need to be building on the intimacy that you have with one another.